Personal correspondence is an individual’s thoughts and
emotional relief. Often, it may be a soul confession. It is in letters that the
spontaneity and frankness of the sender can be seen. Some short note or message
can recreate the person’s character features, circle or interests, attitude to
the events, as well as his/her intensions and attitude to an addressee. It’s
interesting to read peoples’ letters, so as you can revive the writer’s
feelings, see events and understand the world through his eyes. Often, through
the letters you can get a vivid imagination of an interlocutor, and the
monologue turns to be like some kind of dialogue, where the sender and receiver
have some interesting way of interaction that resembles a vis-à-vis
conversation. A letter is a really good tool to get to know the person better,
since it’s usually easier to write about some things, than talk about them
face-to-face.
In different historical periods the writing style of letters
and messages was different. There were specials guides for letter writing,
where people could find the examples of letters of personal and business
correspondence. Eventually, letter became a tool of business, professional,
private and friendly communication. During the XX century the genres of letters
underwent serious changes. The stream of private correspondence became very low
in comparison with the previous decades. Though, by the end of second
millennium and beginning of third one, new informational technologies and appearance
of electronic mail have given a strong impulse to the renaissance of private
correspondence.
With the appearance of the e-mail phenomenon, letters found
new applications in business and personal communication. Such greetings like
Good day, Hi, Hello can “co-exist” with addressing like Respectable, Dear. The
correspondence became more dialogue-like with the appearance of the fabulous
net-invention of smilies :) and other funky faces and symbols. At the same time
style of writing became more liberated. High speed of letter exchange
influenced the frequency of the communication, making people feel closely
connected on the emotional level.
While correspondence can use mixed styles of writing,
nevertheless a common template exists, similar for many countries; only writing
styles can be more or less expressive. For example, Russian women, by their
nature are very sensual and passionate. Hence, they are more explicit and
emotional in their letters than, for example women in some other western or
eastern countries. It could be said that a more emotional person is easier to
read, and he/she appears more sincere in self-expressions.
Salutation can show the level of intimacy, attraction, or
dislike to the addressee. In general, people in CIS are quite straight. They
only say what they think and feel. It’s good to know such mentality differences
if you are in correspondence with a girl from a post-Soviet country. If you get
a letter saying Hello my dear, it most likely means that the lady appreciates
your relationship and thinks of you as of someone special to her. If, in the
end of the letters she sends you her Warmest regards, it means that she is
sending her warmth and wishes to be closer to you. I’m impatiently waiting for
your answer - says that she often thinks about you and that your letters became
a part of her life. Sending a kiss shows that along with emotional attraction
your Russian bride has already thought about moving to the next stage in your
relationship. And, of course, love in the end of the letter means exactly that
…. :-)
However, despite any possible explanations, letter writing
does leave room for misunderstanding and should never be the only factor to
determine the future of your relationship. If you receive a reply you were not
hoping to hear, don’t jump into frenzy. Think about possible ways your initial
question could have been misinterpreted, and consider asking a reassurance
question, such as Did I understand correctly that you mean…, restating what you
feel the lady mentioned to you. Often our surroundings and earlier events of
the day can cause us to see things in a distorted manner, and it is best to be
safe than sorry.
Aside from the letters written, it is also advisable to keep
notice of other behaviors and attitudes of the Ukrainian woman you are
corresponding with. If she writes you about how much she loves you, but when
you schedule a phone call she is never available, chances are, she is not as
sincere as her letters say. On the other hand, even if she doesn’t write long
letters, but remembers your favorite food and makes a point of telling her
friends about you – you have probably found an honest woman, genuinely
interested in who you are.
Letter writing can be indeed a great way to learn about a
person, to share things that might not necessarily come up during a casual
conversation at dinner. But pen and paper will never be able to substitute the
real person, whom you wish to know. A personal meeting can not be replaced by
any number of well-written long letters or facts shared. Seeing your pen pal in
person will tell you even more about that person: the mannerisms, the tone of
voice, the way one carries himself/herself – all these things will be putting
final strokes to the impression of that special someone you’ve been sending
letters for months.
So, whether by hand or e-mail, brief of lengthy, may your
letters be inspired and lead you to finding happiness and that unique person,
who will complete you!
Single Women in Ukraine
